3 Things To Do Immediately After a Making a Major Mommy Mistake!
Let’s face it, we’re moms… and it’s only a matter of time before we screw things up and make a major mommy mistake! In fact, I should probably just call “The Mommy Mistake” a rite of passage because there’s not a mom on the planet who hasn’t messed up sometime.
In my case, I’ve messed up A LOT…
I’ve forgotten my oldest daughter on several occasions on early release days leaving her to sit alone in the office while the school makes that all too frequent call that “poor child’s mother.” That’s me.
I’ve lost my temper and screamed at my kids. And yes, I’ve even said hurtful things to them during a few of those blow-ups.
I’ve driven across town to notice I got distracted and never totally buckled one of my babies in their car seat… more than once.
I’ve accidentally bumped all 3 of their sweet little heads on the side of the car, doorways, and crib railings more times than I can count.
My latest mess up was just last week when I ordered my son’s Avengers birthday cake for the wrong day and showed up to get it 15 minutes before the party was scheduled to start. He ended up with a slightly janky version of an Avengers cake for his birthday. Thankfully, he was happy and never knew!
What’s your mess-up story?
Mommy Mistakes are a Part of Motherhood
I could run down a list of reasons why moms make mistakes and how we can avoid making them in the future. And while that’s not a bad idea, I’m not going to do that here.
That’s because mistakes are just a part of being a parent. And while we obviously should try not to make parenting mistakes as much as possible, the fact is you’re going to make them no matter what.
And that’s ok!
I’m also not going to give you a list of all the types of parenting mistakes you can make. I’ll let you do a google search for those if you’re ever in the mood for more reminders you’re not a perfect mom. Lol
Right now, I want to give you some friendly and practical advice on what to do immediately after you mess up big time.
When you forget them on the school steps, miss their dance recital, or blow up and say something you regret immediately.
How to move beyond the guilt-ridden quicksand that tries to consume you immediately after the moment. When you feel like the earth is standing still and you’re the worst mom that ever walked the earth.
Can I tell you a secret?
You’re an AMAZING mom!
How do I know this?
Because you’re still reading this post on what you need to do after a major mommy screw-up. That tells me you’re human, a good person, and you care!
And the second secret is, guilt is destructive and doesn’t help you or your child heal and move forward.
Ditch the Guilt
The first thing you must do after you mess up big time is to fight against the temptation to let guilt consume you.
You are a mom… you are not perfect. In fact, we were never called to be perfect.
Feeling awful just shows how great of a mom you are but dwelling on how bad you feel doesn’t help anybody, including your child.
So, forgive yourself quickly!
And remember to give yourself Grace.
Make it Right
After you make a mistake as a parent, making it right can come in many forms. The only required ingredient is sincerity. And I know you’ve already got that so we’re good!
Apologizing is pretty much a given to start off. There’s nothing worse than a parent who screws up and can’t lay their pride aside and apologize to their kids. Where’s the good parenting in that?
Saying sorry is showing a real-life example of how they should apologize when they make a mistake and how they should also give themselves grace.
Once you’ve apologized, find out how you can make things right. A great way to do that is to simply ask your kid how you can make it right if they’re old enough, of course.
Depending on the situation, you may not be able to totally make up for your mistake. But there’s nothing wrong with trying to do something that shows them you care.
My recommendation is to do something like go out for a lunch date or ice cream so you can talk and connect.
Here’s a warning, though:
NEVER fall into guilt and just buy them something to try to mend the hurt. This is a mindless and lazy tactic that will most certainly backfire at some point. Most importantly, it doesn’t at all show you care, and that’s really the point we’re going for here.
After you’ve done what you can to make it right, it’s time to move on. Seriously… let it go.
Chances are, your kid already did!
It doesn’t matter how big or how minor your mistake was, stop stewing in feelings of failure.
I used to yell at my kids A LOT, and I felt guilty all the time. After a big blow up, I would walk around for days consumed by guilt.
That was such a waste of time and it is for you too! It’s better to forgive yourself and spend your time finding solutions if your mess ups happen repeatedly, like yelling or forgetting important events.
I learned simple ways to stop being angry and why I was getting so angry in the first place. Now on most days, I feel like a pretty awesome mom.
And like I shared earlier, I still mess up but I now look at each individual situation and work to fix that instead of lumping them into one big “I’m a terrible mom” guilt fest.
That’s the heart behind this post… how to effectively and productivity handle the situation so you can get back to being the wonderful, loving mom you are.
When was the last time you made a Mommy Mistake and how did you recover? Share your story in the comments below and let’s help inspire each other!
Brandi Michel is the creator of FamilyFelicity.com and when she’s not spending time with her favorite people on the planet – her 3 kids and awesome husband – you can find her drinking cold coffee and sharing her best tips and advice on creating your best “Felicity” family life on her blog! Felicity means joys of heaven, prosperity, and blissfulness. Sounds awesome, right?
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