My wife and I were living a perfect life – new college graduates who were deeply in love with each other, and deeply driven to excel in our corporate careers.
We’d work hard in the day, and enjoy the town and whatever adventures we could find after hours.
But then… parenthood happened 😱😱
One kid, two, kids, …. three kids.
Eventually I discovered a pattern – I think I know how they are made!
This story is pretty standard so far – boy meets girl, falls in love, etc etc.
But where things veer off the beaten path is that while we were growing our family, we were also growing our exit strategy.
The exit strategy out of corporate America – out of normal life.
We became bloggers, and the rest is history.
In the 4 years of building our businesses together, I’ve learned so much about myself and my wife. here are 5 key takeaways for any husband / father whose wife has caught the blogging bug.
#1: The Power of a Mother’s Determination
When first getting started – building a blogging business can seem like an insurmountable mountain.
To go from 0 page views and $0 per month, to building a real, sustainable business… It’s difficult to connect the dots.
This is where your mettle is tested.
I remember coming home after a 12 hour corporate day, grabbing a beer, and sitting down to play with the kids. I was burnt.
And wifey and I would chat for just a minute, but then she would disappear to the bedroom to work on her latest blog post, or to update her social media.
I knew that her day was equally draining as mine, and yet she found the motivation to put all her spare time into building this business whenever she could.
Where There’s a Will, There’s A Way
As a husband – I would look for any opportunity to build up my wife and help her see the fruits of her efforts (even if they were only seedlings at the time). The biggest killer of beginning blogs is a lack of focused, supportive determination from the entire family.
#2: Teamwork Reimagined
The husband goes to work. The wife makes the home… not anymore!
The old model of the 50’s is crumbling, and it’s a beautiful thing.
While there actually were some benefits of that model: clarity of purpose, clear lines of responsibilities… it’s just a broken model.
It creates an unnecessary divide between the roles and it creates a divide in power and responsibilities.
As the husband to a growing mommy blogger, be ready to rethink your responsibilities.
yeah yea you have a primary responsibility – your day job. But it’s simply not enough if you want to build an empire that can lead to freedom.
So be prepared to anticipate your wife’s needs. Does she need 1-2 nights per week completely free from the kids so she can make progress on the blog?
Can you take over dinners for her so she can escape for a bit of a mental break from the kids (and to brainstorm the next post)?
It’s time to pull up your big boy britches – and put in the effort to be the man your wife needs you to be.
And beware: it might not be the classic model that you learned from your mom and dad.
#3: Embracing Our Own Skills
Just because mommy bloggers seem to be taking over the world, it’s not a girls-only game!
You have your own set of skills, whatever they are.
And if you share the vision of building freedom for your family and to unchain from the leash of corporate America, then it’s time to put those talents to use for the collective good of your family.
Start listing out your own skill set and see how it can help out on the blog?
There are the obvious ones:
- Photography? Start snapping stock photos!
- Tech skills? There’s no end to how much you can help with WordPress
- Writing or speaking skills? There’s nothing better than a blog that has multiple voices – it can enrich the experience for the readers and they can build relationships with both of you individually
But it can extend farther than the obvious skills:
- Are you an analytical mind? Help by looking at the blog analytics once a month and help your wife find trends in what is working and what isn’t – It can be easy for bloggers to put their heads down and work hard – but we all need a compass to guide us sometimes
- Are you good at time management? Help your wife figure out ways to save time during the day to dedicate to blogging
Get creative, get involved, and get helpful!
#4: Yin and Yang Works
Are you and your wife like oil and water sometimes? It’s ok to admit it!
So are mine – I think that’s why our marriage works so well. She is a strong go-getter, and I’m the goof ball that keeps everyone smiling.
Without my wife, the family would get nothing done, and we would NEVER find the car keys (I swear I put them in their spot last night…)
And without me, we would be clean, organized, and stressed out all the time (love you, honey!)
The point of this is that you won’t always agree professionally with your better half. Don’t run from it. Embrace it and find ways for 1 plus 1 to equal 3.
Use your differences to catapult your site, not to create a rift in the business and the relationship.
#5: Adventure Awaits The Bold And Brave
I have been funemployed now for 8 months – and it has been a wild ride! Finding new schedules, creating a role within the business for my additional capacity…
But nothing sticks out more than the pure joy of being home when the kids wake up, when they get breakfast, when they go to school, AND when they come home.
The joy of being able to pop into the cafeteria unannounced to share an ice cream with my daughter because I got my goals done early on the blog.
It took serious courage to take the leap and quit my job.
Now my success and my failures are mine and mine alone. I have no employer to blame, and if things change in the industry – it’s all on me to adapt and grow through it all.
I’ve embraced a life of adventure, family, and love.
Want to come along? Start your mom blog here.
FREE: NO SCHOOL DAILY SCHEDULE
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Have schools been cancelled?
Here is a daily “No School Schedule” to help you stay sane and productive right now!
+Plus a list of indoor activities to keep your kids busy.
4 thoughts on “Life as a Mom Blogger’s Husband: 5 Lessons learned”
I started reading this and I thought, “this HAS to be John Whitford’s article.” (And it is!) You had me laughing all the way through it. Seeing you and Suzi work together has inspired many of us who are currently in the “seedling” stage. It’s such a joy to watch the two of you work together and flourish. You give me hope, and I’m sure others as well of our own little tiny blogs eventually growing to the point that we can “funemploy” our own husbands. I will be showing this article to my husband. Thank you for sharing yourselves and your beautiful family with all of us.
Wow John, I loved reading this! It sums up what being a blogging-mom husband is (or should be), quirks and all. The post made me laugh. I, too (like Suzie haha), chose well and can count of my husband’s full support for anything and everything I set out to do. And blogging is not the exception.
I am furiously working on growing my blog to provide a full time income for our family so my husband can say goodbye to corporate America and use his “funemployment” time pursuing his own goals and dreams, whether that be working full time on his stained glass to make it grow into a business, or anything else. In the end, we are a team, partners in crime, and we have found that there’s no better way to grow a family, and make our relationship stronger and better than by truly supporting each other.
Keep up the good work!
P.S. I loved the “funemployed” word. If it’s ok, I may have to steal it someday…but I promise to give you full credit 😀
Hey John, your wife has a high-quality product. Any chance you have a men’s website?
Great article! Thanks for writing this, John. I like your style of writing and enjoyed reading this. I’m definitely going to share it with my husband. He sure could use some of these tips. 😉